I don’t really think about gay marriage all that much in my day to day life, because I’m not gay, and I am married. But recently, I seem to keep butting my head against this issue wherever I turn as something that needs to be thought about. (I should probably mention that we live exactly 121 miles from San Francisco.)

I think the main problem is not the whole gay vs. straight dilemma, Christian morals, or ‘American Values,’ but rather, the fact that in our society over the last 91 years, taxes and social benefits have been deliberately structured to benefit married couples who own property and bear children.

Now, after several thousand years, marriage has a lot of baggage associated with it. I guess the bible folks still think the man and the woman cleave together to become one flesh. I think there may even be an element of ‘Adam gets his rib back,’ which neatly mirrors the ancient Greek ideas about needing both halves to make the Platonic whole, which in the vernacular becomes ‘my better half.’ (Despite the fact that Greek philosophers were generally homo-pedophiles.)

So my bottom line is, I think they’re fighting an uphill battle to call it ‘same-sex marriage’ but I believe with all my heart that serious same-sex alliances should be granted all of the rights and privileges of temporarily married wannabe breeders, or else the straights shouldn’t get any special treatment. (As long as the Government wants to reward me for gettin’ hitched, buyin’ a house, and gettin’ it on, that’s fine, but let’s spread the love, OK?)

My very best and only real friend in the world was a gay man who lived a confused life filled with shame and died of AIDS about 10 years ago, so don’t you dare even ask me about a special amendment to the constitution to document our idiocy about same-sex couples.

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