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It's time to take this bull by the horns and milk it.

Thoughts and observations of an Enneagram Type 7 INFP Beatles fan. I prefer baths to showers, late nights to early mornings, cats to dogs, and Mary Ann. The perfect blog for all featherless bipeds.

Gooblek is a 2-to-1 suspension of cornstarch in water. It acts like a liquid if you move it slowly, but a solid if you hit it or squeeze it. Click below for info on Asparagus Pee.

Asparagus Pee?

Benefits of Pork Chorizo?

Nick Cave - Into My Arms

More American Idol Thoughts

An enigma, wrapped in a cipher and dipped in secret sauce...

American Idol... The Women

American Idol... The Men

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Asparagus Pee Chris Buys a NEW Car!

PC vs MAC - Money

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Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Sometimes I wonder why I still blog, but then I see a few search results like my most recent visitors' locations, and I think, "What the heck were they thinking," but it sure keeps me going.

Thursday, May 15, 2008
Benefits of Pork Chorizo?

On Cinco de Mayo our local supermarket had El Mexicano Pork Chorizo for $1.50 each, so, almost having taken the sobriquet of "Snausage Guy" instead of "Asparagus Pee Guy," I couldn't resist.

I always get this mixed up with Linguica, which I definitely prefer, and I was a little surprised when I went to cook it that the casing was clear plastic that you actually had to remove.

The plot thickened when I read the ingredients list:

  • Pork Salivary Glands
  • Pork Lymph Nodes
  • Fat (cheek)
  • Short list of spices (paprika, chile, garlic, sodium nitrate)

But see, I have this theory of nutrition that says there are trace elements and unique proteins in almost everything, so, salivary glands and cheek fat, I mean, what the heck - what if there's something in there that prevents cancer or West Nile in the same way that vitamin C prevents scurvy and D prevents rickets?

Of course, it's not doing my heartburn or gout any good (hey, I'm old, so lay off), but I like it a lot better than this guy: Chorizo Crawl on Chowhound.

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Monday, April 28, 2008
Nick Cave - Into My Arms

I was ignorant of Nick Cave until I heard him talking with Terry Gross on NPR this morning - I sure wish more people were writing lyrics like "I don't believe in an interventionist God," including me. Anyway, it's a good song - give it a listen.

Update: Ok, so no comments, but come on - listen to the line where he says "I want to walk like Christ in grace and love and guide you into my arms." and try not to like this song.


Wednesday, April 16, 2008
More American Idol Thoughts

Deliberately non-sexy MC Pic.So, I'm watching American Idol™ this evening, and I'm looking at Mariah Carey and thinking, "Hey, I used to really like Mariah Carey, but it made me think again about my old roommate telling me she had a six or seven octave range...

Well, I can personally produce sounds, some admittedly quite ugly, over what, on a good day, approaches a 5-octave range, from a low note that is about a half-step lower than the guy on Elvis's "Way on Down" to a note that I can barely whistle, and I can produce any note along that 4.9 octave scale (which is only possible because I found a way to suck the air in instead of out and cheat-squeak a half-ocave or so beyond my regular fasetto that underlaps my lowest whistle by a note or two. (I do this when I imitate Paul imitating Little Richard, and I'm pretty sure Paul does too.)

Wikipedia had a cool page about "whistle-register", and Mariah has a song on her debut CD called Someday, where she definitely sings higher than I thought people could whistle, and higher than I can whistle by close to an octave, but after that, what's the point? Dog whistles?

Again, definitely not knocking MC - she's undoubtably one of the greatest singer/songwriters of our era. I'm just sayin'...

I listened to her first CD again tonight, and I have to say that I think she is probably the most effortless, if not the best, singer of our generation, but I was very disappointed that it seemed obvious to me that she lip-synched her AI performance this evening, and I can't think of any reason why that would be necessary unless she was sick.

Wednesday, February 27, 2008
An enigma, wrapped in a cipher and dipped in secret sauce...

Asparagus Pee Quote.

"I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth."

- Umberto Eco

Thursday, February 21, 2008
American Idol... The Women

American IdolI have just finished my evaluation of the Top 12 female contestants, and here is my current ranking:

  1. Alaina Whitaker
  2. Syesha Mercado
  3. Ramiele Malubay
  4. Alexandréa Lushington
  5. Carly Smithson
  6. Joanne Borgella
  7. Asia'h Epperson
  8. Kristy Cook
  9. Amanda Overmyer
  10. Brooke White
  11. Kady Malloy
  12. Amy Davis
So, at this point, my 4-to-Go for tomorrow's show are: Luke Menard, Jason Yeager, Kady Malloy, and Amy Davis. Place your bets.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008
American Idol... The Men

American IdolI have just finished my evaluation of the Top 12 male contestants, and here is my current ranking:

  1. Jason Castro
  2. Michael Johns
  3. David Archoleta
  4. Danny Noriega
  5. David Hernandez
  6. Colton Berry
  7. Robbie Carrico
  8. Garrett Haley
  9. David Cook
  10. Chikezie
  11. Luke Menard
  12. Jason Yeager

Friday, February 15, 2008

Monday, February 11, 2008
Asparagus Pee Chris Buys a NEW Car!

Chris Benson in his new Asparagus-Pee Mobile

Well, after driving an 18-year-old '89 Honda Accord for over 16 years, I broke down last month and bought a 2008 Toyota Matrix XR.

It's not the perfect car I've been dreaming of, but it was the closest fit to some pretty tough criteria:

  1. List price under $20,000
  2. Largest cargo capacity for a small car
  3. Over 30 mpg highway
  4. Moonroof
  5. Silver with grey interior
  6. Not embarassingly ugly

Here it is with the seats down.

By the way, if you think Christmas is coming earlier every year, please be aware that the 2009 Toyotas are already here. They came out the end of January.


Friday, February 01, 2008

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